


I'll Become

by belivets (orphan_account)



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Abortion, Gen, Genderswap, Past Mind Control, Unplanned Pregnancy, but there's no actual rape, mentions of past rape, there may be flashbacks though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-07-15
Updated: 2012-07-25
Packaged: 2017-11-10 00:15:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/460118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/belivets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clare Barton is fine, really. She just wants to move on with her life and go back to the way things were. Unfortunately, life isn't really working in her favour. </p><p>or Clare Barton finds out she's pregnant with Loki's baby. She doesn't deal.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Become

**Author's Note:**

> WARNINGS: mentions of past rape and mind control, with possible flashbacks. Discussion of and eventual abortion. Anymore warnings will be added if and when needed.
> 
> I prompted this at the avengerkink meme, and then decided to just fill it myself. The first chapter is pretty short, but other chapters should be longer.

When she comes back to herself, it feels as if a thick, heavy fog has been lifted from inside her head. There is pain, and the bitter of taste of confusion. Natasha is there of course, and Clare has never been so glad to here her voice. She is comforting in her own no nonsense kind of way, and Clare wants to talk, wants to _know_ but Natasha barely has time to talk, to explain before everything is a rush of aliens, explosions, and battling to save New York from a God, and when this become their life? She makes a note to talk to Coulson later on, because she did not sign on for this shit, and then promptly forgets about it when another wave of Chitauri come out of the portal. She feels as if she's in one of those children's cartoons she never watched, full of superheroes and evil doers and really, she'd find it ridiculous if it wasn't happening in front of her.

Her aim is perfect, because Clare Barton is nothing if not consistent, and shoots arrow after arrow at the Chitauri. Up above her, Iron Man ( _Tony Stark_ her mind fills in for her) is flying towards his death and Natasha gasps something about a portal in her earpiece. Clare ignores them, concentrates on the sure weight of her bow and throws herself into the battle - literally, which she comes to regret later on as she's picking shards of glass out of her hair. She's not really sure how she manages to get down to the ground from the office building she went through, but she makes it somehow. She is very aware of the fact what's keeping her upright is the adrenaline, and she feels three days worth of hunger and fatigue begin to creep up on her. 

Distantly, she's aware that the battle seems to have ended itself between her fall and her trek to the ground. The giant creatures, a horrifying mix of bug and machine, fall to the ground and with the knowledge that's it's over, she allows herself to process her injuries. _Bruises. Lots of them. Headache. Probably a cracked rib or two._ She flexes her body out, hissing when she puts weight on her left foot. _and a sprained ankle. Fantastic._ Captain America (or Steve Rogers as he introduces himself to her later on) offers an arm to support her, and she puts away her pride for a moment and accepts in gratefully. 

Later, when the are all gathered around Loki on top of Stark's tower, she points her bow at him and thinks of how easy it would be to let go of the bowstring and put the arrow through his eye. Hate pools in her gut as she looks at the man who twisted her into something she was not. She doesn't miss the odd, almost predatory look he shoots her as he is being led away. The grip on her bow tightens in an effort to stop the slight tremors that have taken over her hands. 

_Later,_ she thinks. _I will deal with this. I can deal with this._ Until then, she has just helped save New York, and it's been days since she last ate. She could really go for some shawarma right now. 

The shawarma restaurant is barely a restaurant anymore, the hole in the roof an obvious reminder of what just happened. The terrified looking couple duck out from under the counter at the sound of them approaching, but Stark flashes a smile and promises to pay for damages if they wouldn't mind cooking something for them? The couple gape at them and nod quickly, scuttling off to the kitchen. 

The team all but collapse onto the chairs as the excitement of battle finally begins to leave them. Clare winces as she sits, and props her injured foot onto Natasha's chair next to her. Natasha shoots her a look, but her face is soft and her fingers begin tracing soft circles on the toe of her boot. 

None of the team talk much, all too weary to try and make conversation. Sometime during the meal, Banner (who, thankfully, had borrowed some of Stark's clothes after de-Hulking in the tower) looks at her, startled, as if only just realising she was there. "Bruce." He says, and then promptly blushes when the rest of the group turn to stare at him. "Sorry, it was just. None of us had met…" He trailed off, waving a hand at Clare. She looks up from where she has only picked at her shawarma and shrugs. "S'fine. I guess I was a little tied up earlier. Clare." 

Stark smirks at her from across the table. "Well then, Katniss. Welcome to our little island of misfit toys." Next to him, Banner huffs out a laugh, and Thor looks at him in confusion. Clare flicks a pickle at Stark, face turning smug when it hits him on the forehead and suddenly the atmosphere is relaxed, the awkwardness all but disappearing. Leaning back in her chair slightly to watch Stark and Rogers bicker, she tries not to think of Loki, left up in Stark tower, and lets her guard fall slightly. She's safe now, and he can't get to her again.


End file.
